Top 5 Worst Break Up Lines

Guys, a word to the wise:
Those corny, canned lines you come up with when you want to “Break Up” with a woman are schlock. That’s right, schlock. They’re disingenuous, false, and they are empty.

Don’t even try these on us

You know the scenario: after about six dates, a guy gets bored or totally afraid of any kind of commitment. Perhaps the woman isn’t “putting out” or he thinks a younger, blonder, hotter, woman would find him sexy and mature. He had heard, ‘Younger women dig older guys.” Cool. So, the guy decides to “Break up” using the oldest lies in the book.


Don’t even think about telling a woman any of these five egregious lies:

  1. Babe, you’re just too good for me. I’m going to set you free.
  2. My old girlfriend called and she wants to get back together.
  3. I’m not feeling the magic anymore. We gave it three weeks. I’m moving on.
  4. Hon, it’s nothing personal. I just need some space.
  5. I’m going to lay off dating for a while.

Really? That’s all you got?

Pray tell, what thoughts are ricocheting through the mind of a woman hearing these heinous lies? “Oh, whatta schmuck.” “Can’t wait to tell the girls about this dud.”                “Ta-ta Mr. Hair Club for Men.”

sad man

A Classic Scenario: The Playboy in a Prius

Lothario: He is 50+, recently divorced. Brand new to online dating – he views it as a potential “Booty Buffet.” He wants to make up for lost time – with as many women as possible. He remembers himself as a “10” (a long, long, time ago.) When he looks in the mirror he doesn’t see the saggy, baggy body, thinning hair, the dated wardrobe. He has heard incredible stories about online dating- how women are lining up- the rules have changed- it’s a par-tay every night.

And, it’s off to the races! 
Eventually, old Lothario – admits he is out of practice, out of shape – he is out of his league; and not quite the Casanova he thought he was. Bummer.

FACT: Younger women are looking for younger men. A few women at the bar have compared him to their fathers. Not only is the not getting “any”- younger women will allow him to buy them a drink – or drinks for all their friends – and then disappear- with the younger, hipper, cool dudes in the cool GQ outfit. Reality check.

So, gentlemen take a minute, wrestle with the concept of integrity and learn the truth will set you free.


Best Advice: Date your decade, dude.

“Nothing more completely baffles one who is full of trick and duplicity, than straightforward and simple integrity in another.”        Charles Caleb Colton

This entry was posted in Dating at 50, Dating Diva advice, Dating in Marin, Page Larkin Marin, Relationship, single in Marin and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Top 5 Worst Break Up Lines

  1. Pl says:

    Reblogged this on Suddenly Single in Marin and commented:

    Don’t even think about using these…

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