EHarmony is funny – not ha-ha funny – just strange?

Mitzi moved from Sausalito to Sacramento to be close to her kids/grandkids.

She is 66, ready to retire, a sometimes tennis player, she volunteers, and is a superb cook.

As her career slowed and her free time multiplied, she decided it was time to meet a “date for life” and blithely signed up for EHarmony.

She plowed through the countless, boring pages of quirky and bizarre questions. She figured six months would be adequate time to meet a handful (or two) of great guys and have fun doing it.

She paid the big bucks, sat back and waited.


EHarmony is a funny animal… but not ha-ha funny.

You say you want to meet somebody in the Bay Area and they send you “perfect dates” from Boise, Idaho, Boring, Oregon, and Bismarck, North Dakota.

You clearly indicate you want to meet somebody within a one-hour radius of your home.

Those crazy kids in India (EH employees- can you spell outsourced?) think that Phoenix is close, and Albuquerque is, too. Get a map, get a globe, and get an idea, EH.

HERTS_2276Mitzi likes the Giants, movies,  dancing, Yosemite, has a wonderful garden, is a creative cook and knows wine. Any cool guy her age and demographic would be lucky.

She called me for “First Aid Appointment.” We reviewed her mini essays, Bio, pics and tweaked and updated all. We cast the net wide (50 to 90 miles) to see who might be compatible and have mutual interests in the vicinity.

PicMonkey Collage

Note to the Men: What Not to Wear- Dating Profile Pictures

1. Never post a picture of you with a woman (EX, BFF, date, daughter)

2. Delete all grainy, fuzzy, antiquated photos from high school. Current (2015) pictures only.

3.  The Naked Truth? Bare Chest? Barrel chest? Topless?   Unless you look like, Dwayne Johnson or Daniel Craig, cover up, Daddy-O. Leave something to the imagination.

4. Not So Easy, Rider: The headscarf, sunglasses, leathers, motorcycle and lacy tattoos up and down your arms are an acquired taste. Note: Go neutral the first photo; the great reveal comes later, dude.

Delta Don, what’s that flower you have on? We scoured the EHarmony, male population, 65 to 72, and were hard-pressed to find another professional with remotely similar interests. Mitzi doesn’t like motorcycles or fishing in the Delta in Stockton, guns and hunting is not her cup of Earl Grey.

15DATING1-master675The Take Away?

Try EHarmony? Maybe. But, only for a one-month trial.

Try’s free 3-7 day free trial.

Take a look OKCupid-it’s free and you can spend hours reviewing profiles. You be surprised to see some of the same faces on also on OKCupid (or Plenty of Fish)

This week, Mitzi is up and running on OKCupid. She is much happier with the demographics. We may have lift-off. Stay at 50? 60?

How is that working for you?

Tell me your story:


This entry was posted in Dating at 50, Dating Coach in Marin, Dating in Marin, Page Larkin Marin, single in Marin and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to EHarmony is funny – not ha-ha funny – just strange?

  1. Sally says:

    I would like some dating first aid. How do I reach you to make an appointment? Not looking for free advice.

  2. Pl says:

    Reblogged this on Suddenly Single in Marin and commented:

    What’s the harm in Eharmony?

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