and those pesky flashing Amber lights?
Here is how to Decipher “Cyber-dating Signs”
In the beginning, Internet Dating is two things: amusing and addictive. It’s like a drug. As a virtual virgin you find yourself sucked into hours of scanning photos and reading profiles.
At first, you conscientiously read every profile that the famous dating company serves you on a silver screen. After all, you have waded through pages and pages of questions and written multiple essays on life and goals.
It’s like a romantic Rorschach test. You’ve supplied name, rank, cereal flavor, a plethora of likes and dislikes and paid the big bucks.
Throwing caution to the wind, you take the leap. What do you need to know first?
Remember: Look Before You Leap – Notice the Red Flags
Don’t Date That Guy:
- If you call yourself “Spiritual, not religious”and , fundamentally, he carries a Bible everywhere– push the pause button. Not a match.
- Look out: Say you’re voracious reader, runner, writer, Rumi- fan and their idea of fun is snuggling and watching TV- Caution: they are not going to change.
- Opposites Don’t Attract: If you loved these movies: Holy Motors and Memento – and they liked Rocky, Rocky 2, Rocky 3, – not a match.
- A Picture is Worth… When you meet your ‘match’ and they don’t even remotely resemble their photo, caution. Amber lights flashing.
- It’s all About Me: If their online dating profile consists of boasts and brags about all their accomplishments and their two favorite words are “I” and “me” – time for you to say the magic word, “Next.”
- Homebody or Hyper? If your list of passions is short and succinct with the highlight being “quilting and knitting” and you find merely reading their list of activities is totally exhausting: Red flag.
- Smarty Pants? If your IQs aren’t in the same realm – it might be a red flag. If they ramble on about Byzantine art, quarks and metaphysics and you keeping thinking: too quirky and want to taking a quantum leap outa there. Not a match.
- The Marin County 4 -H Club – Are you more into Hai, Hot Tubs, Harbin- getting high… or being hearty, healthy, handy and heady?
- Devil in the Details: If you thought, he said Penn State and he really said ‘State pen’: Big red flag.
What’s wrong with this picture?
Frankly, my dear: We are all on our very best behavior the first few dates.
On approximately date #4, the gloves come off. Reality rears it’s pretty little self. Best Advice? Buyers beware -be savvy, be safe. Talk on the phone before you actually meet. Ask questions, lots of questions.
Pay attention to the smoke and mirrors and the man behind the curtain… waving those little red flags.
San Francisco Dating@50 Examiner, Page Larkin, welcomes your feedback, questions and queries at firstname.lastname@example.org.