See the Red Flags and Stop Signs while online dating?

photo_612_20051201stop Are you confused by Red Flags, Stop Signs and flashing Amber Lights?


Everything I know about online dating, I learned on the Internet

In the beginning, Internet Dating is two things: amusing and addictive. It is like a drug. As a virtual virgin you find yourself sucked into hours of scanning photos and reading profiles.
At first, you conscientiously read every profile that the famous dating company serves you on a silver screen. After all, you have waded through pages and pages of questions and written multiple essays on life and goals. It’s a romantic Rorschach test. You’ve supplied name, rank, cereal flavor, a plethora of likes and dislikes and paid the big bucks.

Throwing caution to the wind, you take the leap. Look Before You Leap  and Notice the Red Flags

  1. A match?If you are a hip, sleek Ipod and they are a cassette player – there may be room for concern.
  2. Say you’re voracious reader, runner, writer, Rumi- fan and their idea of fun is watching TV- note: they are not going to change.
  3. Go Daddy: If you loved the game and all the commercials for the Super Bowl and they didn’t – at all (including the puppies, Doritos, talking babies.) Go, Daddy.
  4. Stranger that Fiction:When you meet your ‘match’ and they don’t even remotely resemble their photo, caution. Amber lights flashing.
  5. Me, Me, Me: If their profile consists of boasts and brags about all their accomplishments and two favorite words are ” I and I”  – say the magic word, “Next.”
  6. Snuggling: If your list of passions is short and succinct with the highlight being ‘Snuggling on the couch’ and you find just reading their list of activities is totally exhausting: this is a big red flag.
  7. If your IQs aren’t in the same realm – it might be a red flag. If they ramble on about Byzantine art, quarks and metaphysics and you keeping thinking: too quirky and want to taking a quantum leap outa there. Not a match. Next!
  8. Moody and Disordered? Do you see facets of anger, rudeness, moodiness, and addictions? Red flag.
  9. If you thought, he said Penn State and he really said ‘state pen’: Really big red flag.

Frankly, my dear: we are all on our very best behavior the first few dates.

On approximately date #4, the gloves come off. Reality rears it’s pretty little self.

Best Advice? Buyers beware: Be savvy, smart and be safe. Talk on the phone before you actually meet. Ask questions. Take the time to get to know your potential date.

red-flagDude, did you see that huge, crimson, red flag?

Pay attention to the smoke and mirrors and the man behind the curtain.

San Francisco Dating@50 Examiner, Page Larkin
, welcomes your feedback, questions and queries at

This entry was posted in Dating in Marin, Relationship, single in Marin and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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